The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Randomize
