you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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