Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize