just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
