we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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