Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
