It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Randomize
