i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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