I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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