Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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