butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
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