i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Randomize
