Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
