Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
