How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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