Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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