I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
