just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
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