$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
