what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
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