Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Randomize
