every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
