i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
