awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize