It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
