Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
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