My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
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