I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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