Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
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