Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Randomize
