All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
