before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
