whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
Randomize
