We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
