she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
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