I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Randomize