if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
