So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
Pants are for mortals
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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