take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
