Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
