Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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