So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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