just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize
