He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize