u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
