worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize