What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize