you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
