they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Randomize
