I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Randomize
