Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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