Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
