Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
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